


detraction | Sohn Youngjae

by Driwed



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Eric - Freeform, mature - Freeform, plaaything, theboyz, theboyzfanfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-03
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-07-20 06:42:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 15,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16131782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Driwed/pseuds/Driwed
Summary: Eric's story of the murder mystery, Seaside.





	1. Attention

**DO NOT READ THIS STORY IF YOU HAVE NOT READ _SEASIDE_ FIRST. PLEASE READ _SEASIDE COMPLETELY_ THEN COME BACK TO THIS. THANK YOU.**


	2. Attention

First half of TBZ: Sangyeon, Jacob, Younghoon, Hyunjae, Juyeon, Kevin are a year older than the second half

Second half of TBZ: New, Q, Haknyeon, Hwall, Sunwoo, Eric are a year younger than the first half

 **Notice:**  Jacob, New, and Sunwoo  **do not**  exist in this au world. Freshman and Sophomore are the  **specific**  moments that Eric held dear. Junior will be based on random days during the months, leading up to December 20, his  **last**  day on Earth.

 **Another Notice** : I did my research on university/college education in Korea and it's basically the same as America. So, no one in this story is underage, but,  **I**   **know**   **that**   **they're still**   **minors**  outside of this story. But for the sake of the story, a few members  **may or may not**  use a bit of  **sexualization**. So, please, bear with me, I'm  **not**  doing it for fun or my own benefit.  **Thank you for understanding**.


	3. Eric: freshman-sophomore

Name: Sohn Eric. Birth date: December 22, 2000. Gender: Male. I signed off at the bottom and it was the first time I had signed off for anything on my own. I knew this was only the beginning of what was to come for the future.

I remember when I applied for my ID. After a week and a few days, I held my ID for the first time. "What are you thinking about?" "Nothing really. Just homework." I felt him repeatedly hit my back then place a piece of paper in front of me. "You're going with me right?" "Yeah, totally." I was thankful for the world blessing me with such a wonderful friend like him. I was surprised that he even approached me as I probably looked like the nerd type in his cool boy eyes. "Don't forget you hear?" "I promise, I won't." I swore then and there I'd never break a promise with him unless I saw it necessary.

There were bodies everywhere you turned. He held my hand tightly as we pushed through. "Maybe we should just leave..." "And miss the biggest party of the year?" He had a point. Many people have made lifelong friends or met future spouses. At least, that's what I heard from current students at a college fair. "That's what I thought. Now hold on tighter." We soon broke through the crowd and arrived in the center of it all. Underage drinking, some doing hookah or vaping off to the side. A few smoking here and there. Horny teens feeding their desire out on the floor or also off to the side. It was a sight to behold. Everything I had never really experienced was experienced in one minute.

"This is wild. You coming with?" I shook my head then let go of his hand. "I know you're going to get wasted, Younghoon. So I might as well be the responsible one to get you back to your room." "Fair enough. Glad to have someone like you looking out for me." He ruffled my hair then went over to socialize with others. "Hey." I turned around and saw a taller guy take a sip of his drink while looking at me. "Hi..." "Don't worry, it's juice, so I'm not drunk." "Aha..." "Name's Haknyeon. You?" "Eric." He shook my hand then draped an arm over my shoulder and sighed. "Wanna get out of here?" "I would love to, but I have a friend here..." "He'll be fine. Someone will bring him back."

I found myself still at the party sitting off to the side, watching Younghoon make a fool of himself. I had taken a few videos to tease him with later. "Still, why didn't you leave?" "You seemed cool, so I figured why not get to know you better?" I couldn't help but smile as I never imagined having more than one friend so quickly. School had just started over 2 weeks ago. "So, how do you like school so far?" "It's alright. But now it's better because of you." I was positive that our friendship would be something incomparable at that moment.

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I sighed as I didn't understand what the point of reading was. The professors should know that no one is going to read. I closed the book then wondered what my two new friends were up to. Just then my phone dinged signaling I had gotten a text. "Huh...I don't know where this building is..." I groaned and hated the idea of looking like the lost freshman. I dragged myself to the RA and asked about the building. "Thank you." "Be safe." I was confused by her statement then wondered if something happened in that building. I pushed the thought aside and considered it as nothing.

I pushed open the door then marveled at how the interior looked. "I should learn where everything is for the future." I made a mental note of that then hurried to the room. I peeked my head in and saw Younghoon talking to one of his professors. I quietly stood outside and waited for him to come out. "Ah, you came. Wanna grab some lunch?" "Sure." I figured it'd be okay even if I didn't have money on me.

I watched in envy as he came back with a burger and fries. "You aren't getting anything?" "Nah, I'm dieting." That was far from the truth, but how could I proudly say I'm broke and haven't found a job yet? "Here, you can...have half." "I couldn't, it's your money, your food." "I'll be insulted if you don't eat it." I sighed then took the half from him. I took a bite then a few more as it tasted amazing. "I'm guessing you were hungry?" "No, it's just really good." I was happy then. He was someone who was kind and didn't look for anything in return. I looked up to him for that.

_What happened to you?_

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I blew into Haknyeon's ear then moved before I could get hit. "You brat." He chased me around the campus then grabbed my arm. "Now you can't escape." "Oh no! What ever shall I do?" He snorted then flicked my forehead. "Sometimes I wonder why I decided to become your friend." I snickered while rubbing my forehead. "Because I'm amazingly talented." He erupted into laughter as he walked towards his housing hall. "Yeah and I'm related to the president." I pouted then received a pat on my head. "Don't you have a class soon?" "Canceled." "Ah, then come over." I nodded then wondered what his room looked like. I was told that a person's room usually revealed who they are and their interests.

I entered his room and was surprised by how clean it was. My roommate was messy, so his side looked like a junk yard. Younghoon's room also looked like a junk yard, but thankfully didn't smell like it. "I'm guessing you're surprised by the neatness. We're both anti messy, but we're not neat freaks." I nodded then sat down in a chair. He pulled drinks out of the fridge then tossed me one. "So, are you and Younghoon a thing? I'm not gonna judge you." I had started coughing as the juice had gone down the wrong pipe. "W-What...?" He chuckled then pointed his drink at me. "I see the way you two look at each other. And you can't say bros hold hands like that. Cause they don't." I quickly shook my head and shot down his suspicions.

"Hm, shame. Then maybe I have a chance?" Once again, I had started choking and I was sure this time I'd die. "What are you saying...?" "It's just a joke, Eric. Loosen up a bit." He took a swig of his drink then pulled out a small notebook. "Hm, what's that?" "What does it look like?" I threw my drink at him, completely forgetting the cap wasn't on. Juice spilled everywhere and the horror was clearly seen on Haknyeon's face. "Eric!!" I quickly hurried to the bathroom and got as many paper towels as I could.

I wiped down the last spot then sighed heavily. Not a lot of damage was done as it only splashed the floor and his drawer. "You got my notebook too..." I looked up and saw that it was indeed wet in certain spots. "I'm so sorry..." Knowing that I had wet his book made me feel worse than I already did. "Next time, double check before you throw anything." "Duly noted..." I threw the towels in the trash then sat down in one of the chairs. "Well, now that the mood is ruined..." "What mood?" I couldn't help but laugh at his statement as I didn't think there was a mood going on between us. "I guess I was the only one..." My phone buzzed and saw it was my project partner. "Ah, I need to go..." "Oh. So soon?" "I'm sorry. I want to get a good grade on my first project." He nodded then waved as I left. I loved the way Haknyeon held himself and was such a prankster.

_Why did you do a 180 turn?_


	4. Eric: sophomore-junior

**A year later...**

I jumped onto Younghoon and clung to him like a koala. "It's you." "What do you mean, 'it's you'? Of course it's me. We're best friends." He pried me off then scoffed. "We  **were**. Now buzz off. I have chicks to fuck." "I hope they're disappointed with what they see." He flipped me off then walked away. "Ouch. Need ice for that?"

I rolled my eyes as Haknyeon stood next to me drinking coffee. "Whatever, lets go." I was upset. He and I had such a friendship that couldn't easily be broken, but now he's pushing me away. Younghoon was like an older brother to me. We rounded the corner and I felt something cold drench my shirt. "Now look what you-" He looked down at me and instantly shut up. "I'm so sorry." He started wiping me down with napkins and looked horrified by what he had done.

"I can do it myself, thanks." "Um..." "Look, we have somewhere to be, so do you mind spitting out what you need to say?" I hit Haknyeon for his rudeness then motioned for the guy to continue. "I'm Lee Juyeon. Sorry for the mess. Where are you headed?" "Oh, the painting session." "Really? Me too. Let's go together." He linked his arm with mine and sped off, leaving Haknyeon to play catch up. He opened the door and ushered me to go on in. He let the door close behind him and crushed Haknyeon's fingers in the process. "Hak, you okay?" "Yeah. I'm sure I can still paint and write with 3 fingers." "Come on, we'll be late."

I sat in between Haknyeon and another guy who looked to be my age. Juyeon had to wait outside as he hadn't signed up beforehand. We were given instructions then told to paint our hearts out. I was so focused on creating my masterpiece that I had almost failed to notice him tapping me. "Oh, uh, yes?" "Do you mind sharing some of your gold with me?" I moved my palette over so we could both share.

I looked over at his canvas and nearly dropped my paintbrush in awe. It wasn't completed, but it looked like a portrait of someone. "Is that a person? Someone in here?" He looked at me then smiled softly. "It's supposed to be you." I felt my face heat up then quickly went back to my canvas. "I'm Hyunjoon. Heo Hyunjoon. And you are?" "Sohn Eric..." "What a nice name."

I happily placed my painting to the side then watched Hak and Hyunjoon place theirs on either side. "Ah, aren't you in my Math class?" "I'm not sure...is it 105?" "Yep." "Huh, I never noticed you before. Well, I will now. Don't be shy and just sit next to me." We all exited the room and I felt myself being pulled to the side. "Who is he?" "An acquaintance?" "Oh. So, are you free now?" "No, I actually have a class soon..." It wasn't a lie and the last thing I wanted was to miss class.

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I looked around the classroom and hoped to spot Hyunjoon. I sighed when I saw he hadn't arrived yet. I took my usual seat then opened up my laptop. I decided to check my emails and see if any of my professors had gotten back to me. I opened one up and was disappointed with the response.  _"They live for being vague..."_ I felt a tap on my shoulder and saw Hyunjoon place his iced frappé down before taking the seat next to mine. "I still think you trying to use the class as a pick up line or something..." "I'm more classy than that. Something like that is more up Juyeon's alley."

I couldn't help but laugh as it was true. He took a sip of his drink then eyed me from his peripheral vision. "Cute background." I looked at my laptop then realized he had seen it before I changed browsers. I was embarrassed and tried to hide my face from sight. "Don't be embarrassed. I like Twice too. I say it takes guts to have them as a background." "Hyunjoon..." I gave him a hug then pretended to weep into his shoulder. I felt his arm snake around me then gently pat my back. "H-Hyunjoon...?" "Huh? Oh, uh, sorry..." He pulled away from me and ignored me for the entirety of the class.

Hyunjoon had left the room rather quickly, making it difficult for me to catch up to him. "Hyunjoon, wait! Slow down!" He seemed to have heard my pleas and waited for me to catch up. "Do you have another class right now? If so, why didn't you just say so?" "I don't..." "Then why?" "Because..." I continously nudged his side then wished I hadn't as he had lashed out. "Because you're so annoying! God, it's like watching over a 7 year old sometimes. Now I see why Younghoon fucking hates you."

Hyunjoon had walked away and I just stood there, dumbfounded. I didn't know they felt that way about me. How could I know? I hardly listen to anyone other than Haknyeon. Even then, none of them really voiced their feelings to me. Or have they and I've just been a oblivious fool? I started to cry. It hurt a lot, knowing your best friend since the beginning now hated you, that a friend you wanted to become close to hates you as well. I ran back to my dorm room and stayed there. I missed the rest of my classes that day.

_Was that your honest answer then?_

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He put another piece of fruit into my mouth then sighed in satisfaction. "I must be taking up your time." "No, not at all. I love spending time with you, Juyeon." His smile had widened and caused me to smile as well. It was an interesting friendship for me, if I was going to be honest. It resembled how my relationship with Younghoon used to be, but amplify it by three.

He bought me things, mostly food, even when it wasn't necessary. Not that it really ever was. Luckily my roommate had a big appetite, so he usually ate most of whatever I received. "Juyeon, really, don't buy me anything unnecessary...I have enough shirts..." "Then is there anything you need? Let me know and I'll get it." I sometimes felt like either I was being too nice or he was just too dense. "Ah, how's Haknyeon?" "He's doing better. I really want to know how it happened." "Maybe it's someone doing god's work of keeping him away from you." I turned to look at Juyeon who simply shrugged.

"That was oddly specific, Juyeon..." "So you think I had something to do with it?" "There's no reason why I shouldn't. I know you don't like Haknyeon. Hell, you don't like anyone who I befriend." Juyeon gave me a shocked reaction then scoffed. "I'm offended. Your friends are my friends and vice versa." I sighed then wondered why I suspected him in the first place. He's my friend and has my best interests at heart. I'm sure of it.

I exited my class then saw Juyeon waiting across the hall. "Juyeon, hey." "Want to go out?" "Are you asking me-" "No, I meant, hang out. Goodness, how could I possibly ask you out? We're both straight and have a wonderful platonic friendship." He was right, about our friendship. However, even I was unsure about my orientation at times. It's a natural part of life that I've come to accept. "Sure, where are we going?" "Froyo?" "It's February." "So? Doesn't mean shit. But, you agreed, so let's go." "Wait-" And just like that, I was whisked away.

I slightly shivered as I ate my froyo. "Feeling cold? I can warm you up." "I don't-" He pulled me closer to him and he was rather warm. My cold self moved closer for warmth and was pleased with the results. "Do you regret coming along now?" "Yes." He clicked his tongue then pressed his froyo against me. I recoiled from the cold and fell off my seat.

"Ow...Juyeon..." I looked up and saw that he wasn't even looking in my direction. "You could at least help me up." "You aren't a little kid, Eric. Grow up." He didn't even look at me when he said it. I was confused by his sudden change and I'm sure any person would be. I slowly climbed back into my seat and finished the rest of my froyo in silence.

_Were you preparing for our future?_


	5. Eric: junior-senior, january

**the next year, everything had gone down...**

I woke up then noticed my bed was awfully wet and I remembered it being dry when I had gone to sleep. I sat up then looked over at my roommate who was sound asleep as usual.  _"Was it a wet dream...?"_  As much as I kind of wanted it to be for certain reasons, it wasn't. My entire bed was drenched and so were my clothes. I quickly got up and assessed the damage that had been done. I was thankful that it was only water and wondered who could've done something like this. Then it hit me. "Younghoon."

I tapped my roommate and he eventually stirred. "What." "Did you let Younghoon in here last night?" "Probably. Now let me sleep." I sighed then proceeded to take off my sheets and throw them into my laundry basket. It wasn't an unusual occurrence for Younghoon to pull something, but this was over the top. I decided today would be the day that I gave him a piece of my mind. Hopefully the Younghoon I knew back during freshman year still existed. I quickly freshened up and changed then set out to Younghoon's room.

I mentally apologized to his roommate then banged on the door. I waited for one of them to answer, but it seemed as if neither was coming to answer. Just as I was about bang again, Younghoon opened the door looking tired as hell. "What. Oh, it's you." "Yeah, it's me. You've done a lot, but pouring water all over me in my sleep is a jerk move." "One, why am I supposed to care? Two, that wasn't even me." I rolled my eyes then glared at him with crossed arms. "Can you stop thinking about yourself and actually think about how this affects me? You know I get cold easily. I could've gotten hypothermia."

He seemed annoyed with me, but I didn't care. I wasn't going to let this slide at all. "It wasn't me, you idiot. I like torturing you, not trying to kill you." "Then who else could've done it? My roommate even said they let you in!" I was furious and yelling. I calmed myself down as I remembered there were others on his floor that are sleeping. It ended with Younghoon slamming the door in my face in anger and me in a terribly foul mood.

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I sighed heavily then felt Haknyeon pat my head. "At least it was water." I swatted his hand away then pouted. "Just water? Do you realize how cold it was? Hypothermia, Hak, hypothermia." He didn't say anything else and it worried me. He's changed. And so have the others. Or was it just all in my head? I shook my head the proceeded to leave the dining hall. "Where are you going?" "Somewhere that none of you exist." I was being sarcastic, but he looked really taken aback by what I had said.

"I was being sarcastic...calm down." I slung my backpack over my shoulder and left. I couldn't understand what was going on with them, with me, anyone really. Younghoon was colder than ever. Haknyeon's personality had become timid compared to before. Juyeon had become more overbearing but distant at the same time. Hyunjoon had become sweeter and more understanding of me. I was so lost in thought that I didn't see the person in front of me. We crashed into each other and I found myself stumbling backwards. "Sorry." "No, it's my fault." I handed him his book then smiled. "I'll get going."

"Ah, wait." I gave him a curious look and waited for him to speak. "Changmin. Ji Changmin. We have math together." "Really?" Either I'm really an oblivious fool or he was really an invisible guy. "Yeah. I sit in the front of the class." "Oh." Now it made sense as to why I never saw him. I don't really pay the people in front any attention.


	6. Eric: february

I decided to go see one of the counselors on campus then stopped as I reached for the door. Why was I here? Was it about my troubles with Younghoon, or all of my friends in general? It's not like I couldn't handle it. I've been doing fine all this time. Maybe I just need new friends. The thought of replacing them with new people was a bit scary, but comforting at the same time. I walked away from the door then noticed Hyunjoon watching me from afar.  _"And here I thought Juyeon was creepy."_

He waved to me then motioned me to come over. I briefly held up my phone to check myself out then walked over. I didn't know when I started caring about how I looked in front of him, but it seemed important enough that I did it every time. "Hey, were you going to go talk to a counselor?" "No, I just like hanging around here." He chuckled then started to walk, causing me to follow suit. "Well, maybe we can both go together later. I have some things I need to get off my chest." "Guess that wouldn't hurt."

I poked at my food as I sat alone in the dining hall. I knew what time they all usually ate and used it to my advantage to avoid them. Someone had sat down in front of me and began to eat as if I wasn't sitting here. "Um?" "Don't bother complaining, I'm not moving." Ji Changmin had just then and there proved to be a stubborn one. "Why are you eating alone? Don't you usually eat with like 4 other people?" "I needed a break today." "Wanna talk about it?" Here was someone I had just talked to for the first time not too long ago asking me to spill my feelings and deep secrets. "No."

It was an obvious answer. I had thought talking to a counselor would clear things up, but things only seemed to have gotten foggier. Is that even possible? "Are you sure? Wouldn't it be better to have someone who's unbiased and all? And let's be real, most counselors suck and hate their jobs." It was then that I knew Changmin was my saving grace. The only saint in the hell I lived in.

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Changmin pulled me closer to him and I felt my ass hit his dick. "Don't you think that's far enough...?" "Am I making you uncomfortable?" "Somewhat." "Sorry." He rested his chin on my shoulder and I assumed he was reading along with me. "Hey, how are you feeling...?" "Why do you ask?" "You're talkative, but right now you're quiet." "I'm studying?" He didn't say anything else and I focused my attention back on my notes. Changmin's presence was a calming one and I was glad to have it, especially with what I was going through. "I'm gonna order out, do want anything?" *"Japchae."* He hummed in response then loosened his grip on me.

He had come back in with food and I was quick to put everything to the side. "It smells good." "Of course, I only eat the best. Now hurry while it's still hot." Whenever I was with Changmin, it's like everything was happy and soft. Was I developing feelings for him? I shook my head as that couldn't be possible. We've only known each other for so long. "You're so spaced out today. Are you sure everything is okay? Did they bully you again?" "Not yet. Maybe they finally realized how awful they're being and want to change their ways." We heard a knock on the door and I didn't know who it could be at this time. "Hak? What's-" He suddenly hugged me in complete silence. I couldn't see his expression as he hid his face in my shoulder.

"Haknyeon...? Do you need to talk?" I looked back at Changmin and he seemed to have understood what I wanted. He hurried past us then waved at me before taking off. I closed the door behind us and hoped he would finally talk. "Are you ready now...?" "He burned my book." "What? Who?" "Younghoon. He...he burned it right in front of me...and he fucking laughed about it. That book was precious to me!" He had started crying and I had held him closer. I never thought Younghoon would target anyone in our group other than me. I've had enough of it.

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I spotted Younghoon down the hall then quietly ran up to him and tackled him to the ground. A few other students looked as I now sat on top of him. "You can mess with me any way you please, but don't you  **ever**  mess with anyone else." "Woah, woah, slow down. Mess with anyone else? Who the fuck are you talking about?" "Don't play dumb with me, Younghoon. He told me himself." "Who?" "Haknyeon!" I was close to knocking his lights out. If he ever graduates, he'd make a great politician. All they ever do is lie. "I haven't done anything to him. In fact, I haven't seen him since a week ago." I became confused as Haknyeon had told me a few days ago. Was Younghoon actually telling the truth? I didn't know who to believe now.

*im not sure if i spelled it right so, please correct me if i'm wrong.*


	7. Eric: march

I quietly drank the rest of my tea then sighed. I was physically and mentally tired. Lately I haven't had anyone to talk to and it was stressing me out. Changmin was supposed to meet me over half an hour ago, but he hasn't shown up. I got up to leave then texted Juyeon. I knew he was just as much trouble as Younghoon, but I needed his shifting relationship with me right now. I thought it was a good idea then.

As I made my way to Juyeon, I saw Hyunjoon jogging over to me. "Where you off to?" "Juyeon." "Why not hang with me instead? I want to talk to you actually." I wondered what he could possibly have to say to me. I have long since come to terms that I liked him, but I didn't want to get my hopes up. "I guess I can. I'll just-" Hyunjoon took my phone and put it in the side of his pants. "Come on." I was confused as to why he did that, but I didn't have much time to dwell on it as he had taken my hand in his.

He paused underneath a tree then put his bag down. I followed suit and wondered what he possibly had planned. "Do you trust me?" "What kind of question is that? Of course I do, Joon." "Then let's do a trust fall." I stiffened. The old memory resurfaced and I was quick to step back. "So you don't?" "I do, it's just..." "What?" I never told anyone, not even Joon. I took a deep breath then figured it'd be okay to tell him now. "I...I did one with Younghoon once. He let me fall. I hit my head...Haknyeon showed me the video and there was a pool of blood around my head." Hyunjoon seemed surprised and I don't blame him for being so. It was quite the experience. "I promise, I'll catch you." I was really reluctant, but I did it anyway. He really did catch me. We switched places and I in turn caught him as well.

"So, what was the point of this?" "Because, without a strong foundation of trust, the relationship won't work." "Oh." I then realized what he had said. "R-Relationship...? Are you...?" He nodded then held my hands. "Will you do me the honor of dating me?" "Yeah...Yes." It happened so fast and all I could remember was the feel of his soft lips against mine and the eventual entrance of his tongue into my mouth. What I didn't know is what Hyunjoon had did while I wasn't looking.

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I scrolled through my Twitter then heard something slam against the table I sat at. "Oh, Juyeon. I-" He slapped my phone out of my hands and it landed onto the floor with a clatter. Naturally I got upset and wondered why. "That was unnecessary." "Yeah? And so was calling me and rubbing it in my face! If you wanted me to back off, you could've just fucking said so!" I was confused. "Huh?" "Don't fucking play dumb with me. You purposefully set it up. I hope one of you fucking gets bad karma for this." He walked away, not without kicking my phone first. I felt eyes on me as I bent over to pick up my now cracked phone. Everyone had started murmuring and I couldn't stand it. I ran out of the dining hall.

My roommate entered the room then placed a container of fruit next to me. "I'm going to be hanging with friends, so you can have your alone time. Call me if you need me. There's water and juice in the fridge too." I didn't respond then heard the door close. I was humiliated in front of everyone. Our business was now known to everyone. It may just be a small fraction of the entire school population, but word travels quick. I would forever be known as the guy who fucked up or something like that. I heard a knock on the door and was reluctant to answer it. "Oh, Joon..." He didn't say anything and gave me hugs and kisses. I was happy to know that I didn't have to explain anything to him, but sad as word had already reached him before I could.


	8. Eric: april

I found myself moving strands of hair from Hyunjoon's face as he slept. How he could sleep when he had a test in a hour was beyond me. My phone buzzed and I saw that Younghoon was calling. I was convinced he had long since deleted my number, but I guess the Younghoon from freshman year still existed somewhere. "What?" "I need you..." I had never felt more confused. After countless days of torture and humiliation, he expected me to help him? "No. Figure it out yourself." "Wait!" Somehow he knew I was hanging up and so I waited. "Please, I really need you...I...I'm at my wits end." I never thought I'd hear that come from the ever clever Younghoon.

I found myself knocking on his room door and saw the door open, revealing Younghoon in tears. "Come in already." "Right..." It seemed as if he and his roommate had finally learned what tidiness was as the room looked well cleaned. "So-" I was soon embraced by Younghoon and heard his quiet sobs. "This is weird..." "Shut up..." "Can you at least tell me what's wrong...?" I couldn't believe I cared. I didn't want to care, but I cared anyway. I guess I still saw Younghoon as my first and best friend. "You remember Ella, right?" "Yeah. How could I not?" "She's dead. She's fucking dead Eric. Someone ran her over." His sobbing had become louder and it made me wonder how strong their bond really was.

I gently stroked his hair as he calmed down. "I'm sure if she were alive now, she wouldn't want you crying over her so much. Maybe a little." "I just don't get it. How could no one see a dog that big?" "There are a lot of reasons, Hoon. I'm sure the driver feels just as bad." He cleared his throat then took a water bottle out of his fridge. "Do you want some?" "We can share one." He closed the door then sat back down. "Thanks for coming..." "I only came because you sounded genuinely upset." He shifted in his spot then turned my face towards his. "I'm sorry, Eric. For everything I've done to you. I'm an awful person." "I-" He pecked my cheek then sighed. How was I supposed to react? What was I supposed to say then?

"I just...I don't know. I never stopped caring about you. Nothing can really justify what I've done, but I'll do nothing but try making it up to you." I quietly nodded then noticed Younghoon hadn't stopped looking at me for a while. "Is there something on my face?" "You're just really attractive. Are you still single?" I wasn't sure if I liked how the conversation had changed to this. "No." "Oh." I was soon lying on my back and looking up at Younghoon. "Let's not do this." "Why not? It's not like he's been looking for all this time right?" He? How did he know it was a guy? I became suspicious of him once more. "I think you mean she..." "Really? I always thought you were gay and not bi." Either he was being serious or a very convincing liar as always.

He hovered dangerously close to my lips and my struggling was proving to be of no use. "Please don't do this...I-Instead I'll come over whenever you call and do whatever to cheer you up." He looked into my eyes then chuckled. "I'll take it. I'm sure you have somewhere to be, so I'll let you go." I actually didn't have anywhere to be, but anywhere else was better than being alone with Younghoon. "Feel better." "Thanks."

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"Woah, woah. Slow down. Start over." "We. Kissed. Like. Tongues in mouth." I couldn't help but laugh at Changmin. I knew he had been crushing on this guy since last year, and they had only recently started dating. It was cute to see him so excited. He had suggested we do a double date one day, but Hyunjoon didn't seem pleased with the idea. Somehow I managed to convince him and today was the day of the double date. "Oh, there he is. Kevin!" He had looked in our direction then waved. "Hey! So this is your friend?" "Close friend. His boyfriend is supposed to be arriving soon." I started wondering what was taking Hyunjoon so long.

"Oh, there he...is?" I turned around and saw Hyunjoon walking over with his head down. I guess he really didn't want to be here. I then got up and walked over to him to talk. "Do you really not want to be here? "No, I just have a facial problem." "Let me see." "No." We briefly fought and I succeeded in lifting up his face. "Where did this black eye come from?" He brushed past me and I started to worry.  _"Hyunjoon isn't one to engage in fights..."_  I hurried over then handed him a pair of sunglasses that I usually kept in my bag.


	9. Eric: may

I found myself handing them tissues as we studied for an exam. "You all look awful." Juyeon had covered his face more and Changmin had started rubbing his eyes with a tissue. Younghoon blew his nose and it didn't sound too good. It had also been the first time in awhile since we all got together. "Anyone understand number 6?" Younghoon moved over to Haknyeon and started explaining. Everyone at first had believed Younghoon was just a big buffoon until he solved a problem that they couldn't.

"Ugh, I can't do this. I'm going to go sleep." Juyeon had gotten up along with Changmin. "I'm going too. Text me Hak." The rest of us watched them go and I sighed. "They could've toughed it out." "Yeah, no. They looked dead." "Should we continue?" Kevin had gotten up and went after Changmin I assume. Sangyeon looked at us in confusion. "I guess tutoring session is done." He packed up his things then said goodbye. We had only recently met Sangyeon through Younghoon. Sangyeon was an impressive guy. He was ambassador, in a few clubs and often was the cause of change at school. I wondered how they even became friends. When I decided to ask, he was already boarding the elevator.

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I found myself in Haknyeon's room watching him create drawn lookalikes of germs and cells. "What's this?" "A neuron." "And this?" "Glucose." I nodded and was in awe on how far science had come. "So, why did you call for me if you were just going to draw the entire time?" "I just wanted company." "Was I the only one available?" "No..." I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss the old Haknyeon. He was more bright and peppy. This new Haknyeon was...timid. Like baby almost. I noticed he had put his pencil down and was now facing me.

"Am I different to you?" I wanted to say yes, but what if he reacted negatively? I didn't want to lie either as we kept our friendship free of secrets and lies. "Yes..." "I thought so. You're not the only one who thinks so. My friends, professors and even my sister...They all think and say the same thing." I patted his shoulder then sighed. "Do you possibly have a reason as to why?" "Not that I can think of." "Maybe it's just repressed?" It made sense. Someone can't have their personality drastically change unless something traumatic happened to them or the brain. At least, that's what I learned in psychology. "Would everyone like me again if I was the old me?" "Haknyeon, if they don't like you as you are now, then they were never really your friends."

He hugged me tight and it kind of hurt to hear that he's going through an identity crisis and having friendship troubles because of it. "I'll always be here for you, remember that." "I know...thank you." I pulled away and was a bit spooked by the look in his eyes. I couldn't tell what it was, but it reminded me of his past self. "Oh! This is for you." He handed me a piece of paper and I was astounded. It was me holding a bouquet of flowers. "You drew this?" "Yeah...Remember when I asked you to pose...?" "Ah...Thank you, Hak." It didn't matter whether he was his new or old self. I loved him all the same. I found myself kissing his forehead then wondered why I did it. "Thank you..."

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I felt dizzy as I lied back on Juyeon's bed. "Everything is spinning." "Really? It's crisscrossing for me." I started giggling and he soon followed suit. I found it hard to breath as I was now laughing at the ceiling. I sat up then looked over at Juyeon. "Guess what?" "Hm?" "Chicken butt." We erupted into laughter again then found myself on top of him. "Get off...you're heavy and smell like shit." "So do you." He groaned and slapped my ass a few times before I finally moved. "Do it again." "Huh?" "I want my ass slapped again. It's so arousing." "You like that huh?" "Fuck yeah I do." That one simple action had gotten me hard. Or was there more to it than that?

I couldn't count how many times he had done it, but I knew each time I had moaned in pleasure. "God you're giving me such a boner you little shit." I managed to pry myself free then looked at him. "Sorry." "Don't be. I'm sure you're just as hard too." "I can't...Joonie will be mad." "It'll be fine. Come on." "Noooo~" I became bashful then felt Juyeon pull me onto his lap, but I was now straddling him. "It'll be our drunken secret~" "Okay~"

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I found myself sitting with Changmin and Kevin in the library. "So, it seems Juyeon has been nicer to you lately." "He's always been nice." I often wondered what had happened that night we had decided to drink our problems away. Neither of us remembered and assumed we had both just fell asleep naked. The thought of us possibly having sex never really crossed our minds as we knew how the other was. "Hey! Earth to nerd!" "Piss off." Changmin chuckled then slid a piece of paper over to me. "Wanna go? I heard Juyeon and Younghoon were thinking of going." "Why not. It's been a while since I partied."

Changmin gave me a high five then waved at someone behind me. "Joon!" I ran over and hugged him tight and he happily returned the gesture. "So this is where you were. Why didn't you answer my texts?" Kevin waved my phone in the air then pointed at Changmin. "They were studying and didn't want distractions." "Ah." He sat down in my seat then had me sit on his lap. "So, what are we studying?"


	10. Eric: june

I found myself frequenting everyone's room more often and Younghoon and Juyeon had become sweeter towards me. I felt spoiled at this point. "Hm..." "What is it?" "I want to see him..." "Joon?" "Joon? Right, Joon." I looked down at the paper in front of me and wondered why it was still blank. "Eric, you've been spacing out a lot lately. Is something wrong?" "Nah." I started making the list then found myself unaware of the other things I was writing down. "Are you-Woah. Give me that." I was confused as to what had him so alarmed. "What the hell are we going to use handcuffs for?" "Handcuffs? I thought I wrote hand cream..." He shoved the paper in my face and I had indeed wrote handcuffs. "Maybe you should write it..." "That's the only option here." I felt bad for making Changmin upset. Have I really been spaced out lately?

I spotted Hyunjoon at the meeting spot and hurried over to him. "I missed you." "Missed you too." We shared a kiss then started walking hand in hand. "Froyo?" "Yeah." We walked in comfortable silence as we made our way to the nearest froyo place.

"This is really good." "I know, I came here with-" I stopped myself. Did Hyunjoon really need to know who I was with? "With?" "With money I had to spare and bought some. Delicious..." I gave him a smile then continued to eat. I had never lied to him before, but I didn't know then that that one lie would cause me to lie even more. "Hey, do you have a class later?" "No. What's up?" "Just wanna have a heart to heart with my love. That's all." I panicked on the inside as I hoped he didn't pick up on the lie I had told.

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I quietly read an article then felt Haknyeon nudge me. "What's it about?" "Oh, some mountain up north. Says it's a great place for bonding and such." "Interesting..." "Why don't we all go? When's the best time?" I looked through and was relieved to see they had provided additional information. "They say winter time because you can see something like the Northern Lights there at around midnight." Juyeon nodded in understanding then clapped his hands together. "Let's all go and see it then! December sounds good since we'll be free then." We nodded in agreement then watched Juyeon walk away while texting. "Everything seems great now huh?" "Yeah..." I scrolled back to the images then zoomed in on a certain photo.  _"Looks pretty steep..."_  I noticed another article has been linked to it and tapped on it.  _"Footage of animal falling to its death? What kind of sicko..."_  I closed out of it then sighed. I couldn't help but wonder what it possibly felt like to fall from someplace that high.

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I spotted Younghoon talking to some girls and figured it was okay to approach. I was about to call out to him until he looked in my direction. He said something to them then walked away.  _"Huh...?"_  I walked over to one of the girls and asked what happened. "He said he had something urgent to do." My phone started ringing and I checked to see who.  _"Younghoon...?"_  "Hello?" "Room." He hung up and left me feeling confused. I headed for his room wondering why he didn't just ask me here.

"So you weren't lying." "About?" He played a video on his phone and I saw and heard myself talking. "Oh..." He pinned me against the wall then slid his knee in between my legs. "Don't look at me like that or else I'll get rough." My eyes widened in shock and caused laughter to emit from his mouth. "You're really cute Eric. Shame Joon's got you all to himself. Has he ever done anything fun with you?" "Fun in what sense?" He moved his knee up and down my crotch, causing me to hide my face from his sight. "The sexual kind." "Does it matter?" "Of course. It determines how much fun I can have with you." "That's not-" "You said you'd come and cheer me up. You're going back on your word?" He knew I never did. "No..."

He held me close as I held on tightly to the back of his shirt. I hid my face in his shoulder as I couldn't bear to look him in the eyes. "Eric, look at me." "No." "Eric..." His tone had become one full of warning and I slowly looked up at him. "It wasn't so bad, right?" He wiped the corner of my mouth then chuckled. "Not feeling talkative? Or are you just burnt out?" "I want to sleep..." "Then you can sleep here. I need to go meet with someone, but I'll make sure no one disturbs you. Also, shower before you do. Take whatever you need." I watched as he placed a top and sweats next to a towel then left.

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I found myself once again in Younghoon's room, but for a different reason this time around. "You're good at drawing right?" "I think you're confusing me with Haknyeon." It's not that I can't draw, I'm just not as skilled. "I guess so. Anyway, I just need you to strip. Just your shirt. And then make a pose. Sexy, not cute." "What's this for...?" "Personal reasons. No, I'm not keeping this." A knock was heard and Younghoon seemed annoyed with it. "Who?" "Juyeon."

Younghoon rolled his eyes and didn't bother to get up. "Open this door you asshole!" I sighed then went to answer the door myself. "Well hello there. You busy?" "Um, aren't you here for Younghoon?" "Nope, you. Grab your shit. We're going out." "You can't just burst in and do whatever you want." "I just did." I just stood there like an idiot. What was I supposed to do? Pick a side?

I ended up in the passenger seat of Juyeon's car as he drove along. Silence filled the car as Younghoon was fuming behind us. It felt a bit suffocating as Younghoon wouldn't allow anyone to talk until we reached our destination. "We're here." We all got out and I was thankful that it was a restaurant. I was hungry after all. I could feel the tension coming from the both of them and I was sure the woman could as well. She sat us down and quickly left. "So, I'm assuming you're paying for everyone?" "I'm paying for  **us**. So  **you**  pay for yourself." I hoped they wouldn't be like this all night.

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I was beyond upset as I gently put the glass of water against my finger. Everyone was looking at our table and I was sure we'd be kicked out. "You said you were going to!" "Maybe I lied!" Younghoon had splashed Juyeon with water and that was the last straw. I asked for the check and paid for all of us using their money and dragged them out. "What the fuck is wrong with you two!? Can't we just have a nice night out? No, I don't want to hear it. Juyeon, drive us back." I got into the car and buckled myself in, waiting for the both of them to get in as well.


	11. Eric: july

I was out of my mind. I had texted Haknyeon everything instead of Younghoon. I anxiously awaited his reply and hoped he wouldn't pick up on anything. "Huh..." I hopped off my bed then poked my head out the room. After a while I saw Haknyeon come around the corner and walk towards me. He stopped in front of me then smiled. "So, who was that text for?" I pulled him into the room, afraid of someone overhearing.

"Joon of course. Who else..." "Sure it wasn't for me?" "Very sure..." He stepped closer to me, closing what little space that separated us. He gently kissed me then pulled me closer. I pulled away and couldn't look him in the eyes. "You know I'm dating Hyunjoon..." "But yet that doesn't stop you from getting your dick sucked now does it?" I snapped my head up and wondered how he found out. "What? I don't. We haven't even gone that far!" I had to play innocent. I couldn't let word get out about it. "I'll keep quiet, but in return, if I want a kiss, you  **have**  to give it to me." "No, because there is no one sucking my dick." It wasn't a lie. I pushed him out the room then locked my door. Everyone was changing again and I wasn't sure if I could handle another one.

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I leaned against Changmin as a few tears fell from my eyes. "Do you want something? Breakfast wrap? Burger? Ice cream?" "No...This is good enough." My mind swirled as I tried figuring out everyone's sudden changes, especially Haknyeon's. He was the last person I had expected to want anything romantic or sexual from me. It hurt. Were our friendships only built on sexual relations? I knew one thing that I could do, but I didn't know how bad the backlash would be. Younghoon and Juyeon were notable people on campus. It was obvious there would be mobs of people constantly harassing me in their place. Haknyeon knew every little dirty secret I had and I was certain he wouldn't waste time in spreading them around. That is, if he decided to go that route. I jumped at Changmin's touched then gave him an apologetic look.

"I'm sure the party later this month will make things better." "Hopefully..." I quickly sat up and wiped my face as I saw Hyunjoon approaching from a distance. I had forgotten I had asked him to come over and join us if he could. I gave him the best smile I could as he sat down with us. "Eric, come." I slid my chair over then leaned against him. "Hm, you're acting a bit babyish." "I want to be babied." I pouted my lips and proceeded to poke his cheek. I didn't want him to sense anything was wrong as he had an even shorter fuse lately. "Maybe I should get going. You look like you want some alone time." "Chang, it's fine." "You sure?" "Totally. I'm going to get some food. Do you want anything?" "Some pretzels would be nice." Hyunjoon kissed my forehead then left. "Please, don't tell anyone anything...not even Joon." "Okay..."

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I patiently waited on Younghoon's bed as usual as I had now become accustomed to his way of play. I had eventually stopped complaining as I started to secretly enjoy them as time went on. Even now. I shifted in my spot as my wrist had started to itch, but I couldn't scratch it. "Younghoon..." I started becoming needy. I wanted his touch, I needed his touch. He looked up from his phone then placed it down. "What's up?" "I..." "Hm? Have you forgotten the words?" "No..." He gripped my chin then pulled my face closer to his. "Then tell me what you want." "I want to orgasm already." I couldn't stand his teasing. It's nothing new, but it still irked me to the core. "Good boy." He pulled me into a kiss and once more I lost my sense of self.

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"Juyeon, you said study together, not stare-at-me-while-I-study." "Then stop being attractive." "I'm not though." I never thought of myself as attractive. Maybe cute a few times, but that was really it. I didn't understand what they found so attractive about me. "Anyway, are you going to the party later this month?" "Yeah." I felt a bit spooked by the look on his face, but it didn't look that much different than his usual looks. "Moving on, what the definition for this?" "Why don't we play a game instead?" I slammed my book shut them glared at him. "If we're not going to study, I'm leaving." It was bad enough that I was cheating on Hyunjoon with Younghoon. I didn't need another guy touching me all over. Juyeon sucked his teeth then pushed my other books onto the floor. "Get out." "Gladly."

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We entered the expensive looking house and I couldn't help but feel amazed. A pure looking house was soon to be tainted with drinking, smoking, vaping, sex, you name it. "Chang, I feel a bit out of place..." Everyone was wearing something that was somewhat sexy and seductive while I was in a simple t-shirt, sweats and sneakers. "Your casual is different than theirs. Just stick with me." He handed me a drink then warned me not to take anything from anyone, not even him after that moment. "You just never know, okay? And we could get separated, so you should watch out for yourself." "Got it." I followed behind him like a duckling and was envious of how everyone was getting loose and had carefree attitudes.

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I had found the others and wobbled over to them. "Aaaayyyy, Eric." We tried to high five each other, but our bodily control was below par. "Younghoon, you're drunk as fuck." "You too. You keep missing." I held onto Changmin for support then squinted at Juyeon who's eyes never left me. "You wanna fight?" "No. I'm just admiring your tiny body, your slim waist..." He eyed me up and down then traced my lips. "Your lips so delectable, your pretty little innocence..." Juyeon hugged me from behind and I noticed Younghoon and Changmin had walked off in giggling fits. "Hey..." I hummed in response as I was too focused on a girl doing something in the corner. "Want to feel good?" "Yeah...yeah." He took my hand then led me somewhere.

I pulled Juyeon closer to me as he continued to hit all the right spots. I clawed at his back hard enough that I was sure I had drawn blood as I moaned his name. "God you're so erotic Eric..." He leaned over and rained kisses all over my face, neck and collarbone. It was surprisingly gentle. I gently ran my hands through his hair and he hummed in pleasure. I felt close to my climax and made it known to him as well. He slowly pulled out but continued to hover over me. "Suck me off." I did as I was told without hesitation.

I lied down on my side as I was now tired. My eyelids felt heavy as I tried to fight sleep. "I'll be here...No one will hurt you..." He slowly stroked my hair and I finally drifted off.


	12. Eric: august

I shot up with heavy breathing and looked around. I wasn't in my bed. "You're up." "Hyunjoon..." He walked over then placed a cup of water in my hands. "Drink it all. I'm going to run out real quick then we can started our movie marathon, okay?" I nodded then took a sip of water. Hyunjoon had been doing things like this for a while now or making private phone calls. It made me wonder if he was doing something illegal. Whenever I asked, he'd just brush it off. My phone buzzed and I saw it was a text from Younghoon. I couldn't make up my mind fast enough as Hyunjoon had already come back. I swiped away the notification then put my phone in my pocket.

"You don't find any of this funny?" "Huh? Oh, yeah. It's funny." Hyunjoon paused the movie then looked at me. "What's on your mind. And don't say nothing because I will beat your ass." "Kinky." He glared at me and I shrunk back. "Just thinking about us. Next month we'll be celebrating half a year together." "Very true. 6 months of nothing but loyalty, trust and unconditional love." I sighed internally as I wasn't as loyal as he believed me to be. I felt something touch my hand and I drew my hand back. "Oh...Sorry. I thought it was a bug..." I put my hand over his then gave it a squeeze. "Are you really okay? You woke up startled too..." "Joon, I'm fine. Stop worrying." I knew deep down I wasn't. Guilt and self loathing was eating me alive.

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I was thankful that Younghoon hadn't made any calls, but I found myself missing his touch and his little psychological play. I felt pain in my finger as I realized I had cut it.  _"Why is it bleeding so much...?"_  I hurried out of the room and burst into the restroom. I rinsed my finger off then bandaged it. I looked at myself in the mirror then looked away. I felt disgusted with myself. Sneaking behind my boyfriend's and seeing someone else. Having intense make out sessions with another. Who was I? Was any of this something I was doing willingly? Or was it all blackmail? I tugged on my hair and felt tears falling from my eyes.

I was disgusting.

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I entered and saw Juyeon lying down in bed. "Oh, you're here." He sat up and I couldn't help but look him over. Something told me he purposefully wore what he did to try and get something out of me. "Thanks for the coffee. All nighters can do a toll on you." His shirt shifted and revealed more of his shoulder and collarbone. His hair was tousled but added to his overall look. "I'm leaving." "Bye. You're always welcome here." I quickly shut the door behind me as I had started feeling sick. What was wrong with me? Why did I feel nauseous in his presence? Was it something I couldn't remember? I walked away as I thought of plausible reasons.

I noticed Changmin and Kevin being cute on the grass and walked over to them. "Oh, hey..." Changmin had hidden behind Kevin and we both looked at him confused. "Did I interrupt...?" "Nah, have a seat." I lied down next to Kevin then closed my eyes. I felt at ease and safe in their presence, until I didn't. My eyes shot open as I heard Haknyeon calling after me. "Haknyeon..." "I'm back. I missed you so much. You stopped calling after a while. Did something happen?" "I kept forgetting. I'm sorry." He hugged me then gave me a quick peck on the cheek. "How was the trip?" "You're not going to believe this." I sat back down as Haknyeon told us about his trip.

I remained quiet as Haknyeon unpacked his things. "Your energy is low. Are you tired?" "Yeah..." "You can always take a nap here. I have work to do anyway." I decided to take him up on his offer then crawled into his bed. It was as comfortable as I remembered it last. "Want an extra blanket or pillow? A cuddle buddy?" "No..." I didn't want to voice my actual feelings. I was in enough trouble. "Sure? I don't have to start now."

I broke. I needed comfort. "Can we...?" He climbed into bed with me and held me close. "You always come to me for cuddles. Why not Joon?" I didn't know either. He was my boyfriend, yet I did everything with other people. Was Hyunjoon basically a prop in my life? I still loved him, right? I had started crying and Haknyeon gently wiped them away. "Shh...sleep." And I did.


	13. Eric: september

School was in full swing and I found myself more immersed in my school work than anything. I practically ignored everyone, except Hyunjoon and Changmin. I looked over at Hyunjoon for confirmation and received a nod. "Looks like you're getting it." "All thanks to you." He ruffled my hair then wrote down a few new problems. "Last four and then we can break for food." I nodded then read over the questions. I felt a pit growing in my stomach as they strangely related to us. I hid my emotions and worked on solving the problems.

"Looks good. What are you in the mood for?" "Western." I rested my head on my desk then thought about his questions. Why did he save them for last? It would've been less noticeable that way, unless he was looking for honesty. My mind wandered to Younghoon and how he had gone back to ignoring me. I subconsciously touched my lips then came to my senses. "Guessing you're really hungry?" "Very." I opened up my textbook to get my mind off things, but luck wasn't on my side as I had opened up to where they talk about relationships. I closed it then decided to busy myself with my phone.

We ate in silence then I felt a weight on my shoulder. "Next week is our anniversary. Let's celebrate with the others instead." "Aren't you the one that wanted it to just be us?" "Things are better with friends, right?" I quietly agreed with him then put another fry in my mouth.

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I placed the soda on the table then looked around. Hyunjoon had really hung a banner up saying "Happy 6 months" and a few balloons. "Is the banner really necessary...?" "Of course! They could've forgotten how long we've been dating." I sighed then sat down in one of the chairs. "They sure move slow." The door opened revealing Younghoon and Sangyeon. Juyeon and Haknyeon soon entered and Changmin and Kevin were the last to arrive. "So, we decided that we'd rather spend our anniversary with our wonderful friends instead of by ourselves." "Fun." I felt a strange tension in the air and wondered if I was just imagining it.

Everything was going well until Hyunjoon revealed a lie detector. "Why don't we enjoy a classic? Let's start off with...Haknyeon." We watched as Hyunjoon got Haknyeon situated. "So, have you done something that you know would come back to bite you?" "No." Hyunjoon pressed the button and we all waited anxiously. It shocked him and he seemed genuinely surprised by the outcome. "Huh, who would've thought good natured Hak has secrets." "You have too many." "And you're just a lonely and horny guy." Younghoon and Juyeon glared at each other until Hyunjoon cleared his throat. "You're next Younghoon." He rolled his eyes then placed his hand on top.

"Have you ever backstabbed someone to get back at them?" "Never." It has been proven to be true. Juyeon went next and was asked if he loved me or was obsessed with me. He claimed to loved me but was proven to have been lying. Hyunjoon's turn came up and Younghoon was the one to ask him a question. "Why did you start dating Eric?" "He was interesting to be around and has a beautiful smile. I learned other things afterwards." I anxiously waited as I wanted it to be true. Younghoon sucked his teeth as the shock never came. "Aw, that's cute Joon." My turn rolled around and I became nervous as to who would jump at this chance. "I have one." I looked at Kevin and felt nothing but gratitude towards him. "Do you plan on doing something dumb later today?" "Of course not." It wasn't a lie, but the machine thought so. I groaned in frustration as they started teasing me.

We watched our friends leave then Hyunjoon sighed. "They're disgusting." "Then why are you still friends with them if you don't like them?" "Reasons...just like how you have your own." I found myself clinging to Hyunjoon side as I suddenly got urges to go after Younghoon.

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Hyunjoon hovered over me then leaned forward. "I've been waiting forever to do this with you..." "Yeah...?" He nodded then planted a kiss on my neck. It felt sickening to me with every kiss he left. I sucked it up and let it happen. "So you really are submissive. I thought you were joking." "No." He pulled me into a kiss then ran his hand underneath my shirt and over my torso. His touch sickened me once more. I wanted to puke. I gently pushed him away then sat up. "Go." "W-What..." "I said go." I couldn't make eye contact with him and eventually heard the door close. I bursted into tears.

I heard a knock on the door then wondered who it was as no one but Joon knew I was here. I checked through the peephole then stepped back. Did I want to let him? I felt pangs in my chest as I opened the door. "You don't look good. Should I bring back soup?" "I'm fine, Hak..." "Um, okay...I just wanted to know if we were still going to see the movie tomorrow." "Yeah. Wouldn't miss it for anything." He ruffled my hair then walked away. I wanted his gentle embrace. It always made me think clearer, but I was afraid. Afraid that Hyunjoon was still lurking around.


	14. Eric: october

Younghoon closed his door in my face leaving me feeling deflated. He didn't say anything at all and he always had something to say. I turned around and saw Hyunjoon rounding the corner. I quickly hid then watched as he knocked on Younghoon's door. "Oh. You again." "You know what I'm here for." I watched Hyunjoon walk in then Younghoon shut the door behind him. I wanted to know what was going on behind that closed door. I doubted either would tell me if I asked, so I went with the old listen by placing your ear on the door. Bed creaks were heard soon heard, and I wondered if they had started hooking up behind my back. It made sense. Younghoon was pushing me away for Hyunjoon. I felt hollow inside knowing that. I walked away.

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I had followed Hyunjoon once more and saw that he stopped at Juyeon's door. "You actually came. Wonderful." He ushered Hyunjoon in and closed the door. It was like Younghoon all over again, except now I've lost the man who always doted on me even when it wasn't necessary. I missed that. I quickly texted Haknyeon who replied with "I'm busy". I tried Changmin who happened to have some spare time.

"You look...great." "You don't have to lie." "What's wrong...?" "I think Hyunjoon is going behind my back like I did." "Woah, wait. With who? Why? Explain." I tugged on my hair then sighed. "All of my friends, except you. He was with Younghoon last week and he entered Juyeon's room and Hak said he was busy. He's never busy at this time." "Maybe you're thinking too much of it. He's probably just talking to-" I held Changmin by his collar then immediately released him. "S-Sorry..." "I think you need to go rest and clear your mind." He lifted me up by my arm and dragged me back to my room.

I had woken up then wondered when I fell asleep. Changmin was no longer in the room, so I assumed he left after I knocked out. I didn't feel like being alone, so I called Hyunjoon to come over. Soft knocks were eventually heard and he entered with a smile. "Chang told me not to bother you as you were asleep. I'm guessing you're okay now?" He checked my temperature against his own and it made me winder what Changmin told him. "What's up love?" "I was lonely..." I wrapped my arms around his waist and hid my face in his chest. "It warms my heart that I was the one you called..." I momentarily froze. Did he know something? I had never felt so worried in his presence before. "You're the one I always call..." He kissed the top of my head as he rubbed my back. "Mhm..."

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I thought everyone would've been enthralled by the idea of having our own Halloween party. "It's not that we don't want to, we just prefer to go partying that day." Everyone except Sangyeon and Kevin had sided with Younghoon. "Sorry bud." I was still surprised that Hyunjoon decided to go as well. "I'll just spend Halloween with them." "Actually, I can't. I have a lot of things to do, so no one can reach me once I start." "Oh." Everyone else had walked away and only Sangyeon and I were left. "So, see you then. My room or yours?" "Yours..."

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I stabbed my food then was stopped by Sangyeon. "Either eat or don't eat. Take your frustrations out on a pillow." He released me and I couldn't help but admire his authoritative side. "I didn't think everyone would bail on us today...What's so great about parties anyway? They're just places to get drunk and become a single parent." I was upset and I wasn't afraid to make it known. "Even my boyfriend went! I bet he's sneaking behind my back and-" I stopped. Why was I getting upset for? I did the exact same thing to him. I didn't say anything else and decided to eat. "I'm sure Hyunjoon is being responsible." I sighed then looked at him. He seemed engrossed in his phone and something on it caused a flurry of emotions to appear on his face.

"You want to stay the night? Roomie's staying with his girl." "I guess. Why all of a sudden?" "Bonding time. I'd like to get to know my best friend's friend better." Friend? Is that was I was to Younghoon? I didn't even know what we were and everything we did was beyond just pure friendship. My mind wandered back to how he gently held me. The feeling of his soft lips on mine and on my neck. Wandered back to how he skillfully and gently jerked me off. I started to crave it again. "You're starting to drool...Why don't you eat if you're so hungry?" "Oh, yeah..." I wiped away the drool then started eating again.

I swung my legs back and forth as Sangyeon worked on something on his computer. My mind wander to the party and then Juyeon. I missed getting drunk with him and having intense make out sessions. They were rough, but exciting. It kept me wanting more to the point we'd nearly pass out from lack of air. Was Hyunjoon now doing that with him? Was Younghoon giving him the same pleasures as he did me? I felt something on my face and saw that Sangyeon had moved his thumb across my cheek. "You're crying..." "Am I?" "What's troubling you?" "Nothing..." I curled up next to him in hopes of falling asleep.


	15. Eric: november

I quietly sipped on my taro boba tea then saw Younghoon sit across from me. "You, me and a bed." "Huh?" He pulled me into a brief kiss then said he'd text me later as he walked away.  _"Did he mean sex...?"_  I shook my head and hoped it wasn't that. I felt a tap on my shoulder and jumped. "You've been so jumpy lately." "Have I...?" Haknyeon sat down next to me with his own drink. "I want to talk to you. Later though. You have time, right?" "Yeah..." "Great." He ruffled my hair then left as well. I felt confused as they had now started giving me attention again. A smile crept onto my face without me realizing.

"And so that's why I'm here and not with Kevin." "Just apologize." "No! He tried taking some of my food and I had already warned him beforehand." They usually fought over the smallest things, but it always made my day a bit interesting except for today. "Then just break up. You're always fighting anyway." "How could you-" I silenced him then crossed my arms. "You're always complaining and you fight over the dumbest shit. Break up. Simple." He gawked at me then placed his hand on my forehead. "Are you okay? Are you Eric?" I slapped his hand away then leaned forward. "I am. Now I'm leaving. Got people to meet." I felt different, but I liked it.

I entered the room where Haknyeon asked to meet and wondered why a classroom. "Hak-" My mouth was covered and I was convinced that I was in danger. I kicked back and was soon released by whoever it was. "Oh my...Hak!" He nursed his knee then looked up at me. "I guess that wasn't a good idea..." I crouched next to him then sighed. "What did you need to-"

He pulled me towards him and initiated a kiss. I responded then realized what was going on. "Wait, was this it?" "No. I want you to date me instead..." Did I hear correctly? He wanted me to break up with Hyunjoon for him? I considered it, but even if it's not much, I still loved Hyunjoon. "I can't...I'm sorry..." "Well...then, at least never leave my side?" "I can manage that." I helped him up then wondered if I had kicked too hard. "Hyunjoon's really lucky..." "Why?" "You're like, the sweetest guy ever. And loyal. You also have a wonderful smile..." I wished he took everything he said back.

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I leaned back into Younghoon then wondered what he meant earlier in the day. "Are you worried about something?" "No." He pulled me closer to him then kissed my neck. "You're lying. If it's about what I said, this is all it is. You, me and a bed." I awkwardly laughed then held up my phone for both of us to see. "So, do you want to watch anything?" "I'd prefer music at the moment." He took my phone then went to Spotify. I didn't know what he chose, but soon soft and mellow music enveloped the room. "This feels romantic..." "What if that's what I was going for?" I turned to look at him then felt my face heat up as he smiled.

I quickly turned around then wondered why that happened. We were just friends with benefits, nothing more. "Hey." A shiver went down my spine as his voice had come out low and sultry. "What..." He turned me around then pulled me into a soft yet passionate kiss. I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't pull away. He eventually pulled away then leaned his forehead against mine. "I want you, Eric...but..." The music stopped just as he had released his hold on me. "You should go...Hyunjoon will be stopping by soon." He handed me my hoodie then unlocked the door.

I stood outside his door as we stared at each other. "What are you staring at? Is there something on my face?" "N-No...I just spaced out..." I quickly turned around and left, hoping I wouldn't run into Hyunjoon. However, I ended up running into Juyeon. "Oh, Eric." I looked and saw that he had put away his phone away rather quickly. "What brings you here, Juyeon?" "Oh...Not much. Just going to see Kevin." He brushed past me then rounded the corner. I never thought he and Kevin were close, so I was skeptical about it. I poked my head out and saw Juyeon talking to Younghoon.  _"This is..."_  Hyunjoon had doin appeared from the other direction and their whispering had ceased. I wanted to know what was going on. Why they were secretly meeting behind my back, especially Hyunjoon.

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Sangyeon passed me his shrimp then sighed. "You're so quiet. What's wrong?" "Why does everyone think something is wrong when I'm quiet?" "Because you're always loud." I picked up a piece of shrimp and ate it. I sometimes felt Sangyeon was the only one who gave a shit about my feelings. "Hey, Sangyeon..." "Hm?" "What would you do if you started liking other people despite already dating someone?"

"Well...I'd break up with who I'm currently dating so I won't hurt them. But I wouldn't pursue my other interests until a while after the break up." I was thankful that he didn't question where such an idea came from, but I was sure it briefly crossed his mind.  _"Maybe...just maybe..."_


	16. Eric: december 05

The cold air nipped at my face and sent shivers throughout my body. I paced back and forth in order to keep warm as I waited for Haknyeon. "Hey! Sorry I'm late!" He gave me a hug from the side then let go. "Ready?" "Yeah." He held my hand then proceeded to swing them back and forth. "The trip is in 14 days. Feeling excited?" "A bit. You?" "I'd rather just go alone with you. Juyeon and Younghoon are terrible to travel with." I couldn't help but chuckle as it was sort of true.

I tied my laces then wobbled over to the rink. Haknyeon held my hands as I stepped down onto the ice. "You can hold onto me if you want." "But you'll fall with me..." "I don't mind." He flashed me a smile and sent my heart into a frenzy. I quickly looked away as I linked my arm with his.  _"What is this...First Younghoon and now Haknyeon?"_  I stepped forward then felt myself slipping. He caught me with both arms then held me close. "Be careful..." I made the mistake of pushing away from him and ended up bumping into someone behind me. We both fell and I cut my arm on her skate. "Young man, are you okay? Oh my god..." I just stared at it, completely in my own world devoid of any voice but mine.

I winced as he stitched my wound closed. "You're lucky kiddo. Had it been your face it might've been more damaging." "Right..." I winced again as he pulled. "I suggest you don't use this arm for a while. I hope this doesn't interfere with your studies." I shook my head then rolled down my sleeve. "Thank you..." "We'll let you go in a few hours, so we'll stick you in a room momentarily." I nodded then followed behind him. I wasn't thrilled with the idea of staying longer than necessary, but it wouldn't hurt to see if my body was up to speed.

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"I'm so sorry...It's all my fault." I shook my head as I looked out the window. "No, it's mine..." I sighed then looked at my stitched arm. No one could see it, but I knew it was there. I couldn't forget the sight of it and it made me shudder. "I'll help you with whatever I can, okay?" "You don't-" "I'm not taking no for an answer." "Fine..." Little did I know that he had told everyone about it while I was stuck in the hospital. It was nice having everyone answering to my beck and calls, but I naturally let it get to my head and pissed everyone off.


	17. Eric: december 12

Hyunjoon fed me warm ramen noddles and my cold body had momentarily warmed up. "You should eat too." "I ate earlier, don't worry about me." "You know I will anyway." He lightly laughed then smiled. "The trip is soon, isn't it?" "Yeah, aren't you coming?" "I wish. Something came up and I can't miss it...I'm sorry love." I tried to not let my disappointment show, but that didn't stop Hyunjoon from noticing. "I'm sure you'll have fun with the others." "Yeah..." He picked up the chopsticks again then ate a bit of ramen. "'I ate earlier' my ass..." "Hush." I was happy and he was happy. That's all I really needed, at least that's what I thought.

Kevin ran up to me with a worried look. "What?" "Changmin won't answer his phone." "You're overreacting..." "Maybe, but he could be in trouble." I sighed then found it weird that Changmin wouldn't respond, to Kevin at that. "Did you-" "Yes. Everywhere." "Maybe he just went off campus and is in a no service area." "Hopefully..." You couldn't deny how romantic it was that these two worried about each other this much. In my eyes, their relationship was something special and would probably last a long time. "Anyway, I'd love to stay and chat, but I have an arm to take care of." I walked past him and hurried to my room.

I pulled as hard as I could as I wrapped my arm. Would it be healed before we go on the trip? I doubted it, but that didn't mean I'd give up. The door opened and my roomie dropped his things off at his desk. "Need anything?" "Fruit would be nice." "Gotcha." He left the room and I found myself wanting to be with Younghoon. Or did I want to see Juyeon? Did I want cuddles from Haknyeon? I couldn't figure it out. I could just see each at a different time, but I also had classes. I groaned then decided to call one of them. "Hey." "I want to see you..." He hung up and I became annoyed. He could've at least said no. I decided to nap until it was time for my class.

A knock awoke me from my sleepy state and I checked to see who it was. "You called?" "Yeah..." I stepped to the side and let him in. He sat on my bed then patted the spot next to him. "Let's talk." I closed the door then joined him on the bed. "You called for a reason. What is it?" "Cuddles..." He lied down with me and let my back hit his chest. He rested his chin on my shoulder then began to hum a familiar tune. "You're not going to ask?" "No." He continued to hum and had almost put me to sleep if the door hadn't opened. "I'll just...leave this here..." He quickly left and I kind of felt bad that he had walked in on this.

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I rested my head on the table then felt someone stroke my hair. "Tired, love?" "Very..." He continued to stroke my hair then stopped. "Don't stop..." "I'm just packing up our things. Come on, you can sleep somewhere else." He carried our bags as we made our way out of the classroom and to a quiet area in the building. "Why are you so tired love?" "I decided to do some late night studying. I'd say it worked." He hit my arm and glared at me. "You know doing that is bad for you. You could've lost what you retained." Silence fell over us like a blanket until Hyunjoon had lifted it up. "Hey." I hummed in response as I started to drift off. "Did Juyeon ever touch you in a way you didn't like?" My head snapped up faster than a cheetah could run. "What? Why would you ask that? Juyeon knows his boundaries."

I would've remembered if he had done such a thing anyway. And of all times to ask, why now? Then something clicked in my brain.  _"The party..."_  "You sure...?" "Very sure." I wondered how I could've forgotten such a thing happened that day. "How about Younghoon?" "Joon, what's with the questions? Is something bothering you?" "Can't I check to see if my boyfriend is doing okay?" "You can, but these specific questions..." I held his hands in mine and gave them a squeeze. "Everything is fine. Trust me." He momentarily stared into my eyes then nodded. "I trust you."


	18. Eric: december 19

"It's so cold..." "Come here and I'll warm you up." "Stop it, Juyeon." "Such a party pooper..." I walked with my arm linked with Haknyeon's as the other two bickered in front of us. "Let's ignore them most of the trip." "Agreed." Despite having said that, I knew deep inside that I wasn't going to follow through. "Hey, speed up will you?" "Alright. Don't rush us." We picked up our pace as the other two had gotten farther ahead. "Why didn't the others come?" "Couldn't make it. Sangyeon had some important meeting to attend as he represents our school. Kevin went to visit family and Changmin went with him." "Oh..." And that's how it ended up being the four of us.

We reached the inn and the inside was prettier than the outside. "So, are we going to go see it tonight? If so, there's a few hours left." "Yeah since we leave tomorrow." We had gotten here yesterday evening and just like today, it was messy. The three of them had started arguing over who would room with me and I ended up sleeping alone while the three of them shared a room. I was surprised to see that they had behaved themselves that night. I quietly snuck away from them and made my way to my room. I was tired, but I was also hungry. I closed the door behind me then sighed. I couldn't risk doing anything with anyone here as things were already tense between them. However, that didn't stop me.

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I had opened the door and was pulled into a passionate kiss. He kicked the door closed then picked me up as we headed towards the bed. "We shouldn't...The others..." He silenced me with another kiss then ran his hand over my body. "Why'd you have to dress like this today...Wearing such tight ripped jeans and baggy shirt..." He ran his hand up and down my inner thigh, making me squirm underneath him. "It wasn't intentional..." "Even still...I want to take you right here..." A knock on the door was heard, making Younghoon groan in frustration. "I know you're in there Younghoon! Don't you dare touch Eric!" He pushed up from on top of me and walked towards the door.

I watched as Younghoon closed the door behind him then heard raised voices soon after. Another voice joined in and I started becoming worried. I fixed myself before heading out and seeing Juyeon and Younghoon at each other's throats and Haknyeon trying to separate them. My timing was bad as I had jumped in just as Juyeon threw a punch. They had gone quiet as I sat on the floor rubbing the side of my face. "Dude!" "I didn't know-" Haknyeon was by my side and helped me up. "Let's go get ice." The other two sped off and I started feeling guilt eating away at me. I was the cause of their fighting. Would things get better if I just disappeared? I mentally hit myself for thinking such a thing then walked with Haknyeon back to my room.

I sighed as the three of them sat in my room to watch over me. "You can leave. I'll be okay. Really. And we need to leave now if we want to catch it in time." They got up one by one and left. I grabbed my coat then iced the side of my face once more before leaving. I waited for them by the entrance and saw them arrive. "Let's go." "Yeah..."

We looked up at the sky and were amazed by the sight. "Now I'm really glad we came." "Same." I noticed Juyeon had come over to stand next to me. "Hey..." "I accept your apology." "That's good. One more thing..." "Hm?" "So, I have a proposition for you." I wasn't sure if I liked where the conversation was going. "Break up with Hyunjoon, date me and I'll protect you from everything. Or, you can continue to date Hyunjoon, but I'll no longer protect you from anything." I looked at him in shock. What if I needed him most? Was he really going to just standby and watch? "You don't have to tell me your answer, I'll know." He walked away and I felt as if I was given a life or death choice.


	19. Eric: Last

I looked everywhere but at Younghoon as he clasped a necklace around my neck. "Couldn't you have done it from behind?" "Then I wouldn't be able to see your adorable face." "Stop it..." He kissed my forehead then held my hand. "Whatever Juyeon told you last night, don't let it get to you. You can always depend on me." I nodded then watched as he got up to leave. I held him back by his shirt then released him as I came to my senses. "Sorry...I usually only do that with Joon..." "Oh." I continued to look down then heard the door close.

I looked at the time on my phone and saw that we were going to be leaving soon. I double checked to make sure I had everything. I thought about Hyunjoon and how happy he'd be to see me, unaware of the fact that I'm still sneaking behind his back.  _"Maybe I should just break up with him...It pains me..."_  I decided to do it after we got back to the school. I decided to make plans to see my family this coming weekend to celebrate my birthday with them. "My birthday..." I had almost forgotten about it. I wondered if they had planned anything for then.

"Come on, we're leaving." I gathered my things and hurried over to Haknyeon. "Where's-" "Entrance." Sure enough, they were waiting there. They didn't say anything and I wondered why. We walked down in silence then noticed a familiar spot. I saw that they noticed it as well and walked over. "Let's come back here next year." The other two didn't respond then walked away. I looked down and was genuinely surprised by the height. I don't know what happened, but Juyeon and Younghoon has started arguing. Haknyeon had already gone ahead, so I was on my own. "Hey, could you-" Younghoon pushed me down then stormed off as Juyeon followed. "Come on, Eric or else we'll leave you."

I proceeded to get up, but my hand slipped and I fell back. At first there was nothing then pain started rushing in like crazy. I had shut my eyes as I continued to hit sharp edges. The back of my head had hit something and control of my body was soon lost. The pain was unbearable and it was becoming hard to breathe. I had finally stopped falling, but was rendered completely lame. I felt my body becoming cold then lost consciousness.

_ Haknyeon _

I looked behind me and saw Younghoon and Juyeon about to go at it again. I was getting tired of it. "Hey! Can you two cut it out?" They walked up to me then sneered. "Butt out of this. You're irrelevant." "I'm what?" I was ready to fight both of them at this point. "Where's Eric?" "Behind u-" They looked back and saw that he wasn't. "I could've swore he..." We hurried back and saw his stuff still there. "Do you think he forgot something?" "I'll go check." I hurried back to the inn and was told he hadn't come back.

_ End Haknyeon _

_ Younghoon _

I looked around in case he had fallen and hoped he hadn't. I peered over the edge then noticed something familiar.  _"His scarf..."_  I hurried past Juyeon and ran as fast as I could. If he fell, then it would be considered my fault, wouldn't it? I arrived at the screen out of breath and saw Eric lying in a pool of blood. I ran over to his side and shook him. "Eric! Eric!" He wasn't responding and I grew more concerned. I felt for a pulse and felt my heart sink. I dialed 119 and told them the situation. I tried my best to hold back my tears, but they all came rushing down like Niagara Falls.

Eric was already dead.


End file.
